Do You Protect Or Overprotect Your Children?
Do you consider that you overprotect your children? You will surely answer no. That’s because most parents who make this mistake are unaware that they are doing it. However, it has a solution. The first step is to admit that we have gone overboard trying to care for our children.
The recognition of overprotection is not about condemning parents, much less trying to punish them for not having done better. It must be clear that no one is born with a manual about how to do everything perfectly, especially when it comes to raising and caring for children.
However, when care becomes an overwhelming idea and a constant prevent, prevent, prevent things are not as well on the way as you might think. So, it is normal to ask: Where is the boundary between protecting and overprotecting broken?
If you overprotect, are you a bad parent?
No, you’re not. And fortunately there are always opportunities for improvement. You just have to find a way to acquire the necessary tools to apply a healthy action model that allows us to correct the failures.
Although as parents we are obliged to watch over and care for our children, this does not mean that we should take protection to the point of preventing them from living. Many times we forget that not everything in life is going to be easy and pleasant and that mistakes are necessary to learn and overcome.
Suffering cannot be avoided. What can be done is to provide tools to help our children both to avoid problems on their own, and to face and solve them when necessary. This, in other words, is about creating a positive attitude.
Parents must build a home in which their children grow up safe and sound. An environment where they can talk about what danger is and how to deal with it.
If we find ourselves a threat in everything and we strive to eliminate risks at all costs, we will not only end up exhausted but we will cause our children to grow up with great insecurity.
Fears will promote a lack of confidence in themselves and in others. They may not even see the opportunities in challenges and make poor decisions, only to stay in a comfort zone and apparent safety.
The benefit of the mistake
If we find ourselves a threat in everything and we strive to eliminate risks at all costs, we will not only end up exhausted but we will cause our children to grow up with great insecurity.
Fears will promote a lack of confidence in themselves and in others. They may not even see the opportunities in challenges and make poor decisions, just to stay in a comfort zone. It is necessary to respect their right to make mistakes. Let us remember that learning through experience is one of the most enriching for human beings.
We must protect the lives of their children, provide support in key moments, correct their mistakes and celebrate their successes. Children must be allowed to live and learn to function and think for themselves.
The idea is to build your confidence and raise your self-esteem. Be with them without interfering in their decisions. Let them live and, above all, think for themselves. That is what protection is all about, to ensure the well-being of your children, without extreme stress.
Distinguish the concepts well
Evaluate the differences between these two terms, and then you will know if you are overprotecting your children or not.
To protect
- You accompany your children in difficult times.
- You help him to have autonomy.
- You educate your little one to live and to coexist.
Overprotect
- You exile your little one. You remove him from any situation that presumes danger.
- You cancel the personality of the child. You answer for him, draw his conclusions and predispose him to certain situations.
- You let yourself be carried away by fear and you inhibit the child from living his life to the fullest.
Tips to avoid overprotection
- Avoid demotivating conversations with overly protective messages. Telling him, you will not be able, I will do it, is an example of this.
- You have to let them experiment, materialize their ideas and make their own decisions. If this leads them to failure, we must instill in them the importance of learning from our mistakes.
- The reasons for some orders or duties to be carried out at home can be reasoned. However, there will be others that must be done without any explanation.
- Affirm responsibility for your actions. Teach them to visualize their mistakes and to apologize when necessary.
- It is a mistake to anticipate their demands. Our children are capable of solving any adversity. If they need help, they will ask for it.
Children have to walk their paths, make their lives. Parents, even if it is painful, should allow themselves and avoid living through them. Therefore, if you overprotect your children, it is time to start correcting it.
