My Son Has No Friends: What Do I Do?

“My son has no friends.” Throughout the article we will talk about the possible causes and we will give some guidelines to help our children in the search for friends.

Human beings are social beings by nature.  As social beings that we are, communication between all of us is undeniable. In fact, the proper functioning of society requires good communication among its members. For communication to take place, we establish certain ties with the members of the group. But if my child has no friends, how does he build relationships?

Well, when we see that “my son has no friends,” the situation causes us pain. Seeing the feelings it arouses in children can overwhelm us as a parent. What to do if my child does not have friends? What can be the reasons? How can we act? Would the right thing be to give it time? Or maybe you should go out to the park looking for a friend? If my child has no friends, what do I do?

These questions can be posed to us when we find ourselves in this type of situation. Seeing that a child has no friends is hard for parents. Knowing that our son is rejected by others is something worrying, to the point of, on many occasions, not knowing what to do. Throughout the article we will give some answers to the previous questions.

The importance of the family in social development

There is no doubt about the importance of the family for the boy and the girl, especially in what has to do with their social development, since this represents the first essential stage of socialization. The family system provides a psychosocial space in which boys and girls obtain the distinctive elements of culture and social norms for their subsequent integration into society.

The quality of the family relationship has a significant influence on the development of the social dimension. Psychology scholars recognize the family as a determining factor in the socialization processes of early childhood. There are many theories about socialization that exalt the presence of a strong association between the type of parent-child relationships existing in the family and the development of children (Cortés and Cantón, 2000).

The family as a primary context is where the boy and the girl achieve the primary qualities of subjectivity that differentiate them as social beings and belonging to a certain social regime. Socialization in the family is a learning process  in which, through a process of interactions with parents, the boy and the girl assimilate knowledge, attitudes, values, customs, needs, feelings and other cultural patterns that characterize all life his style of adaptation to the environment (Valencia, 2012).

My son has no friends, what could be the cause?

Some of the possible causes are:

1. Suffering bullying or bullying. Both physical and psychological harassment by his peers does not allow him to socialize. As this happens, the infant may fear relating to peers, or may not be able to develop certain social skills or abilities. You feel insecure after being rejected, which will lead to toxic relationships in the future.
2. Be hostile and domineering. The boy or girl who imposes or uses force to achieve ends, will end up being rejected by his peer group and will try to get away from him.
3. Be a ‘snitch’. If you can’t keep secrets and are constantly betraying your peers, no one will want to be your friend. Knowing that they are going to betray you makes you walk away from that person.
4. Lack of social skills. It is likely that they are not related because of shyness or embarrassment. For some, making new friends is difficult, either because of insecurity or fear. Lack of empathy is another factor that contributes to rejection.
5. Isolate yourself. The prolonged use of new technologies facilitates the loneliness of children. There are many of them who have a screen as a friend and this encourages them to be isolated day after day.
   
6. Having a psychological disorder or illness. Finally, suffering from a psychological disorder or some disease can also mean that our son or daughter does not have friends. Certain psychological disorders prevent or hinder communication.

The pain of knowing that my child has no friends, how can I help him?

Some aspects that we can promote in our children so that they learn to make friends are:

• Teach them to start a conversation and keep it up.
• Capture and respond to social signals that may arise.
• Interact positively with others.
• Listen and understand what others are saying.
• Find children with similar interests to our son.

Remember: not having friends does not mean they have a personality problem, so have your child practice the skills necessary to make friends. In case of suffering it, the most advisable thing is to go to a specialist as soon as possible to address the problem.